The other side of GHOST: LIFE PERFORMANCE PERFORMANCE for EARNING LIFE (Interview Tape for Langu*** S**r)

Watch video  clip for The other side of GHOST

 2013 May, I just graduated, and had to get a job to support myself. As a foreigner, who doesn’t have any “practical profession degree”, there are probably two kinds of jobs that I could get: Working in exotic/oriental Asian-type restaurants or teaching Chinese, and I had done both of them in the past year.

Anyway, this video is about my first teaching-Chinese-related-job interview for a famous kid’s language chain tutoring center “Langu*** S**r”, they sent me a sample-lesson video and asked me to do it in Chinese. Basically what I had to do was introducing myself a little bit, and teaching an invisible boy, whose name was Charlie, how to speak puppy, kitten, and duckling in Mandarin, then to play a game about “finding the puppy” with him.

It’s actually really difficult to force myself to watch this video, for some unexplained reason I felt pretty shameful and embarrassed about it, it’s like running into a scene that I shouldn’t see. Some of my friends strongly suggest that I should show it as one of my performance piece, including those who could barely watch the video because their native language is also Mandarin. But that’s not the main reason that I put this video at the end of all my documentations.

For me, this video is more like an annotation of my other project “GHOST”, both of them reflect my reality as a foreigner, but in very different perspectives, and I would like my audience to juxtapose them when they see this show. Chronologically, this footage also works well as a representative final chapter about my life in Chicago for the past three years. Most important of all, unlike showing other documentations that I have power to control how I present myself, showing self-images that really bother and frustrate me in public is a whole new experience, like a new experience of living in reality.

GHOST/ 社會意義下的鬼魂 {The Social Meaning of Ghost}

2011年我終於離開小島，前往冬天長達半年的城市求學跟生活。為了在作品裡證明不失風骨又努力融入當地文化社會，我：
（1）打扮成亞洲寶貝到街上問路人們對亞洲寶貝的幻想並想辦法實現他們的幻想，（2011，“亞洲寶貝”）

（2）邀請大家躺在滑板上從我的兩腿中間穿越，（2012，Across the Universe）
（3）甚至在公共場合炫耀我擁有在地的情感關係。（2012，Get a Room）
這些作品的共通點在於，它們光明正大地出現在我的作品集裡—述說我即使在新環境中，仍是一個正常的好人，並擁有健全生活。然而，當回頭去看那些來芝加哥後做出來的、上不了風光作品集檯面的失敗作品碎片時，我發現了一件事，那就是：

我並不是一個正常的好人。
在新世界裡，我其實是一個看起來像是正常好人的鬼魂。

於是我決定畢業之前，窮盡畢生可能的最後的創作機會，來好好說明當一個社會意義下的鬼魂是什麼感覺，這就是我畢業製作“GHOST”（2013）的由來; 而此次駐村計畫，便會架構在原有“GHOST”的基礎上繼續往前延伸。“GHOST”這件作品由三個部份組成，分別是Ghost 0，Ghost ≈，以及Ghost [()]。在說明這三個部份如何構成前，先說明一下我如何理解當鬼這件事。

我的社會鬼魂認證基本上是從我的留學生／移動人口身分而來，一個從原有系統引渡到新系統的中間地帶; 在兩個系統之間，最大的剝奪便是語言的失落。「語言的失落」，並不只指涉中英文轉換這種直接的功能性困難，還包括文化語境的空白。如果我們都同意，對環境的理解，時間的累積，和他人的溝通都是作為個人自我認同的重要架構，那麼當這些架構傾斜時，鬼魂就逐漸從自我認同的消融中逐步顯影。在這個詮釋上，我選擇了兩種基本元素來蓋出我的鬼魂遊樂場，它們分別是耳塞（訊息的阻隔）跟鏡子（自我認同/訊息的反射）。

GHOST: Ghost 0

＿＿＿＿ 會坐在椅子上， 
＿＿＿＿ 會帶上（噪音消除）耳機，

＿＿＿＿ 會聽見 _ _ _ _ _ 裡的 _ _ _ _ _


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觀眾坐在高腳椅上，戴上噪音消除耳機，裡面的錄音部份是一所教堂內的現場音，進入教堂的人裡面不能說話。高腳椅上面有一面鏡子，觀眾可以坐在高腳椅上抬頭往上看地面的倒影。 

GHOST: Ghost ≈

摀住你的耳朵（或不要）  
看著鏡中的自己（或不要） 
跟隨著地板上的歌詞（或不要） 
一邊移動一邊唱出歌詞（或不要）

*****

觀眾戴上噪音消除耳罩，一邊沿著鏡子前面的歌後退一邊唱歌。同時，現場會有人拿麥克收音。貼在地上的歌詞是 “roll, roll , roll your boat”，所有的歌詞都是鏡像呈現，必須靠牆上的鏡子才能讀出正確歌詞(整首歌歌詞為“roll roll roll your boat, gently down the stream, merrily merrily merrily merrily, life is but a dream”)。歌詞有三輪（之前展出因為場地限制，只有兩輪），每一輪歌詞間隔依照等比級數放大距離（參照圖解，第一輪歌詞間隔是一尺，第二輪為兩尺，第三輪為四尺）。 歌詞部份，每增加一輪重複的部份就會增加一倍。例如第一輪歌詞是“roll, roll, roll your boat”，第二輪就變成“roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll your boat”(“merrily merrily merrily merrily” 也是)，第三輪以此類推。 

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聽鬼唱歌按這裡 GHOST IS SINGING

GHOST: Ghost [()]

你戴上了耳罩並把頭塞進那個東西裡，

你看看四周並打開了開關，
你開始模仿你聽到的聲音， 
你模仿了你身體外面的聲音，

你模仿了你身體裡面的聲音，
你關掉了開關並看看四周，

*****

“那個東西”指的是旋轉燈罩，裡面貼有鏡面反射紙。觀眾把頭放進去時會看到自己的倒影。 觀眾可以戴上耳罩，在燈罩裡面模仿自己身體外跟身體內的聲音。

Ghost 0，Ghost ≈，Ghost [()] 不是同一系列的三個作品，而是同一個作品的三個部份，它們互相說明作為社會意義下鬼魂的狀態：它的狀態跟靜音一樣，不被語言系統視為有實體意義的存在（Ghost 0）。在這種情境下，所有語言訊息的接受跟傳達都被延緩或歪斜，憑藉著相似之物的記憶或他人對語言的反應做出判斷；而這些落差不只存在於對語言／語境的敏感度上，更存在於溝通回應上的時差（Ghost ≈）。當鬼魂赫然發現自己無法再跟人類溝通時，它才明白做為社會意義下的人類意思在於做為一個集體溝通迴路的節點，它所經歷的溝通短路在於它從未產生過集體之外自我溝通的迴路；在幾翻掙扎嘗試建立自我溝通迴路之後，它最後察覺自我溝通迴路的可能性像獨角獸的存在一樣難以確認，並在震驚之中意識到自己成為一個看起來像人類但又不被視為人類的形體（Ghost [()]）。

"I am falling in Hate with you"

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Watch video clip for "I am falling in Hate with you"

Once upon a time, I had been sort of fooling around with an anonymous guy, and as you know, it didn’t turn out pretty. Being heartbroken in the other country isn’t the funniest thing in the world; I even couldn’t go to any karaoke bar in Chicago to express my sorrow by singing heartbroken Chinese love songs. Anyway, I needed to get a closure for myself without getting in touch with this guy again, so I decided to start my low-profile/ bitter-sweet revenge. I made a pile of paper stripes said “I’m falling hate with you” (I know I didn’t do the sentence right, but you have to understand that I didn’t speak English as well as I do right now, and I paid my whole attention to my REVENGE without being aware of the typo), and stuck them all along the way from my place to the guy’s place.

One month later, I tore off all the paper stripes on the street and still feel comforted by my idiotic action.

"GET A ROOM"

"GET A ROOM" 地鐵版影片連結看這邊 /VIDEO CLIP FOR GET A ROOM (building version)
展場版本影片看這邊/Get A ROOM (gallery version)_

Video installation, projected on the windows of two opposite buildings that CTA trains go through between them. No audio, slow motion.
 
錄像裝置 (無聲，慢速播放)，影像投在兩棟面對面大樓的窗戶上，芝加哥地鐵會從兩棟樓之間穿越。

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What I did here was setting up 2 video cameras on each side of a bed to document interaction between a couple that lied down on the bed.

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These 2 footages (of lover 1 & lover 2) are synchronized in my video installation “Get a Room”; both of them are played in slow motion without audio part.

 The next step was figuring out where and how I want to show this installation. My new boyfriend Robert (at that time), who only tried to please his new girlfriend by helping her doing her project, later realized that his image would be projected on a building window.

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Version 1, on the building:

It’s a very site-specific installation, which located around Adams & Wabash CTA station. The station sits between two school buildings belonged to SAIC, they are called as Sullivan Building and Sharp building. Anyway, what I want to do here is project each video on one of each building’s windows across to each other, so the couple ‘s images could be face-to-face. In that case, the CTA trains could go through between the couple’s image, and the passengers in the cars would run into a enlarged private scene unexpectedly.

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Version 2, in the gallery:

This is easier to explain than the building version, instead of projecting two videos on the windows, they are projected on the walls in the gallery across to each other, in smaller scale. I also experiment with the shape of different interior space.

你要去哪裡？ Where are you going?

你要去哪裡？ Where are you going? 影片連結看這邊/ (here>>) "where are you going" video clip

特別感謝 Cindy Mei (梅慶芳)幫忙拍攝照片
Special thanks to Cindy Mei for Documentation

這是我修的課“游擊隊藝術”的作業，我走在街上，看到有人在等車或等人或站在原地，我就會過去問他可不可以讓我用粉筆把他們的影子畫下來。畫完影子以後，我會標記出日期跟時間，還有他們要去的地方或他們在等什麼。

This is my assignment for "Guerilla Art" class. I walk along the street, asking people who seem to wait for something or stay on the spot that if I could trace out their shadow or not. After getting their permission, I would trace out their shadows, mark date and time, and write down where they are going or what they are waiting for by chalk.

車車親一個 Besos for Trains

車車親一個影片連結請看這邊/ HERE>> Video clip for "besos for trains"

Go to CTA station, put on your lipstick and kiss a stranger sitting behind the window.

Across the Universe

Across the Universe 影片連結請看這邊/video clips for across the universe

觀眾躺在滑板上，從裙子下溜過去。
他們可以選擇在裙子裡面待多久，並提供照相機讓觀眾在裙子裡面照相或錄影。

I would put on my hoop skirt with a string light installed inside it, stand near the entrance, and let my participants lie down on the skateboard. They have to go through under my hoop skirt. They can choose how long they want to stay inside the hoop skirt. Then I would hand them some props such as camera to take photos etc. After struggling through my legs, they would go through a transparent tunnel with a sentence “You Are Reborn” stuck on its top.